Analiza: Welcome to the Women of Color Rise Podcast. I'm Analiza Quiroz Wolf, proud Asian American mom of two, and former CEO of a nonprofit and Captain in the US Air Force. I'm on a mission to support having more diverse leaders at the table. We'll be talking with successful CEOs and C suite women leaders of color and learning about their leadership journeys. If you're a woman or woman of color, who wants a seat at the table, you're in the right place. Now let's get into today's show.

She is currently the president of Acute Care Pediatrics for Pediatrics Medical Group. She was the co-founder and CEO of Nightlight Pediatric Urgent Care for 14 years before the company was acquired in March 2021. She got her degree from Cornell both her industrial engineering degree which I love because I also majored in that and her MBA from Cornell. She's also a mom, she has two kids, a teenager and a boy and a girl. And they love to travel and enjoy places and also volunteer. So I'm so excited Zawadi for you to be here and learn about your story. Thank you so much.

Zawadi: Thank you so much for having me. I'm excited.

Analiza: So Zawadi,I want to start with your background, just your upbringing, and how that has shaped your career path, and particularly where you are today.

Zawadi: Yeah, so I grew up in Austin, Texas. So native Texan, and a family of five children. I had an extremely strong mother who was disciplinarian and very focused on education. And so even through all the ups and downs, and, you know, being in poverty and, you know, moving around looking for places to stay, and just craziness, I would just characterize it as that she was just standing in constant, she was like, you're gonna go to school, you're going to excel, you're going to participate in extracurriculars. And so it was like this dual life, you know, where we had like, just steady focus on education, and then craziness at home. So it just, you know, like, people at school just had no idea of all the, you know, insecurities, you know, food and housing insecurities that we had growing up, because my mom was just very consistent about, you know, how we were to present ourselves at school and what the expectation was, and so we all excelled went on to get college degrees, and you know, or are thriving citizens and contributors to society. And so I think that's really what drives me. And just, I saw what was possible. And my mom also had the fortitude and insight to connect me with people that were professionals, women of color that were professionals, our engineers. So even at a young age, I knew what an engineer was. And I saw that they were professional, they drove nice cars, they lived in nice houses. And so I'm like, I want that. You know, and it's like, that's why I think mentorship and exposure is so important to kids, because you just don't know what a child is going through what they're experiencing. But when they see something, you can spark something in their imagination, and expose them and show them that there's a different path. And so that's what my mom did for me. She introduced me to women that she worked for, that were engineers that were project managers in the tech space. And that's what I aspired to. I just studied them, I asked them where they went to school, what they studied, one of the women who I loved, and was a great mentor, went to Cornell. So that's how I knew about Cornell. And otherwise, I would not have known about Cornell. And so I just followed what I saw, and saw that there was a path out of the insecurity that I experienced as a child. And so that's what really propelled me and drove me to go a different path.

Analiza: So Zawadi, it is interesting to hear just how you talk about your childhood because it was hard. And yet you have this bond with your mom. She provided some stability and that there was a commitment to education and also these extracurricular activities. And so I'm curious as you reflect on your childhood with both the hardships and also what you learned from that.

Zawadi: I just think it's like a community. You know, there are people that went out of their way to get me that extra that I needed, or really just the basics. I remember this one woman gave me luggage when I graduated from high school, and I just was like, What's this luggage for? And she wrote me this note, because she's like, you're going to travel the world, I think it was just the notion, and the reliance of community like other people, and you know, it doesn't have to be blood, relatives, blood family, it could be just people that, you know, like, again, that my mom worked for women, and my mom's circle that she worked for and saw, they saw how hard my mom worked and her commitment to education, and they just filled in the gaps. You know, plenty of people contributed to my summer camps during the summer as I went to engineering camps, you know, during the summer during high school, and my mom didn't have the money that other people, you know, somehow there was always a ram in the bush, there was always, you know, a means in a way for to get me to the next step. And so for me, what I took from that was just community, people giving contributing mentorship. And so that's why that's always been such a major focus and importance of mine. Because I know what that did for me.

Analiza: It's a powerful concept. And I think in our American individual construct, it's, you got to be strong by yourself and not rely on others because you never know. And pull yourself up by your own bootstraps. Yes. So somebody told me because of that myth, I mean, you debunk that myth with this. Now, so tell me, are there other myths that you learned as a young Zawadi where you realize later in life, that actually that's not true?

Zawadi: I think, you know, there's all kinds of myths that, you know, needs to be debunked, like you said, just the whole notion of pulling yourself up by the bootstraps, you know, if you don't have any bootstraps, there's nothing to pull up. And so I think, for me, again, just community going back to old school, asking for help, and I know, that's not always easy, especially if you're a giver, like me, and I'm giving, giving, giving, well, sometimes you need to be replenished, and need to have people give on to you and you need to receive and be gracious and humble enough to know when you need that help of receiving and humbling myself to receive the gift of love and gift of time. And just to be kind to myself that I don't have to do it all, you know, the whole myth is you have to be able to do it all. And I just think that's crazy. That's why people are, you know, depressed and depleted and stressed and all of that. And so I just, I go out of my way in this has to be very intentional, because it's just not my nature to say, to think ahead, like, where do I need help? Like, last week, I was traveling. All of a sudden, I needed to travel and the young lady I normally used to help, you know, with the kids while I'm traveling, was not available. And so I just sat down like, Okay, who can I call that can help, you know, and I had about five people on my list. And the first person I called was, like, Absolutely, like, what, like, how do I need to show up? Where do I need to show up? Like, what do you need? And so it's just one of those things where I just have to be very intentional, if I plan in advance. And you know, even if I don't, that's another thing, like almost such a planner. So I feel like if I didn't give people way advance notice then I don't have the right to ask. And so that's another thing, I just think I speak for myself really hard in regards to asking for help. And so whenever I have asked for help people just are falling over themselves to help. And so that's always been such an encouragement to me. And I just think that we just need to be kinder and gentler to ourselves.

Analiza: Hear, hear. So already, we are always trying to be strong and not need anyone. But there's so much power and community and not just giving to the community but also receiving and that allows people to show love, like, oh, somebody asked me like I have something of value that I am able to give you. There's a certain humility and reliance on each other that brings us closer together. So powerful. So what I want to go into this idea of trauma, because I'm also going to just say, honestly here that I've faced trauma as a child as well, and that there is as women of color, the process of healing, and that there's generational trauma passed on from parents, their parents, their parents, and I have realized later in life, I wish I had known this earlier that there exists this trauma and that without deliberate care, we can pass it down to others. And so I'm curious, Zawadi, for you as you think about it. I know you're very passionate about diversity, equity inclusion and you speak about these topics. Can you share with us your own reflections on trauma if there's any healing that you can share about yourself or just any thoughts about how to go about this?

Zawadi: Yeah, I think definitely facing trauma is very important for self care for healing and for progress, because you tie a piece of yourself up, and it's bound and wound up that, you know, you just in order to show up completely and freely, you know, you just need to release yourself from that bondage for a long time, I had, like, you know, this hostility with my dad. And so over time, over the years, you know, I did seek some help and understanding, like, what that looked like, and how that was showing up in my life. And it was had effects on how I was relating to my husband. And so, and seeking that help and, and getting some ways and some tools, you know, we all just the tools in our toolkit, a lot of times, like you mentioned is generational, like he did the best he could with what he had. And so just understanding a lot of the things that he experienced and went through as a black man that grew up in a very segregated society that did not recognize his brilliant, and him being frustrated that he didn't reach his potential that didn't have to prevent me from having a very satisfying healthy relationship with my husband or with myself, and just feeling that I was lacking a father's love towards the end of his life, we reconciled and I knew kind of like how to set boundaries, you know, how to set boundaries of what was safe, and what was protected for me, was very key to understanding that I can have a relationship with someone on my terms on the terms that was good for me, and what I needed, in order for me to be a healthy, thriving individual, getting a set of tools, just talking about it, and just talking about releasing things and what that does for you, in your own life, and how you can thrive and, and be kinder and gentler to yourself and to your spouse and to your children, you are just things that were I was manifesting as like, that's how my parents did it. So that's how I was gonna do it, even though I hated it as a child. This is like, Well, why are you perpetuating something that you hated as a child? Like, let's unpack that? Let's understand, like, you know, how can we do things better? So just challenging myself? Even, like, I know better? So I should do better? So just understanding how I discipline my children, how do I affirm them? You know, I'm very intentional about it. And because we don't have a manual or rule book about how to parent, you know, a lot of us are just following the footsteps of our parents, which may or may not be the best model. So I'm actually spending the time just like I would do a job or an important project or whatever, I'm studying to see what's the best path forward with my children, just understanding their personalities and understanding, you know, what motivates them is completely different. And just having that that's so completely different than what my how my parents parented us, I think it's worth the time and effort and intentionality for me to figure out what's the best way to get them from point A to point B, so that when they leave my house, that they are thriving, you know, contributing citizens to the community into the world. And so I think that that completely is different than, you know, my parents parenting style is completely different than what I had initially gone into this whole journey, being a parent, but through my own journey through my own therapies, just like, Okay, I want to do better, you know, I want to do better, I want to do significantly better, you know, in that old myth, I turned out, okay, I think my parents are very, we're all very fortunate that we turned out okay, considering the circumstances. So I'm not willing to roll the dice on my own. So I'm gonna try to be a little bit more intentional about, you know, our path forward. But I think for me, just understanding like, just what I went through, and just how really fortunate I am that I did make it on the other side. And so, like, what are the good things that I experienced? Lots of love, and tons of love, you know, my mom just taught us grit and determination, like she had three jobs always working. So just making it like, You gotta grind like, you know, she was a hustler. So like I learned that, there's things I learned and gleaned from the experience that I'm like, Okay, I see what hard work gets you I see what a goal gets you. She was like you're gonna get your degree. You know, that was always that was never up for debate. So I you know, so the love the grit, the hustle the goal, like okay, all of that was good, like some of the other stuff I'm gonna scrap that while the rest of that and so and just harness that and then add in some stability. Add in the affirmation. I think the biggest thing was this stability. I am still on my journey. I'm so trying to figure out what exactly Zawadi Bryant wants to be when she grows up. But you know, I think that I, again, I don't harbor any hatred or any, I don't harbor any of that, you know, I just have released my father as well as my mother from what I experienced, just understanding that they did the best that they could with what they had.

Analiza: Wow. So powerful. So for our audience, just to help to codify the amazing wisdom that you shared with us, I'm going to just try my best to share the many tools. So one is just recognition that there's generational trauma, and we will continue to pass it down if we're not even aware of it. So one is awareness. Second is seeking help, that there is nothing wrong or weak about seeking help. In fact, it's a powerful move to get some licensed therapist or anyone who has the skill to support us through these difficult times, whether it's talk therapy, or any of these other methods. Third is that there are our parents and their parents, everyone's just doing the best that they can, including us. And that means making mistakes. So there's a sense of humaneness. That doesn't rid the experience, but it acknowledges that it happened. But we all did the best that we could. And there's both upsides. Fourth is there are upsides that have helped shape who we are today. But five, there's also the not so upsides and the downsides, the ones that we want to release. And so being really deliberate about what we release is critical. And then six that we can decide, we can decide for ourselves, what the narrative is, how we raise our children, how we partner with the people we love. And finally, I would say that there are ways in which we must affirm and love ourselves. Because as we give, give, give to others, if we don't start with ourselves, then we're, I think, repeating some of these same mistakes. And so I think I captured Zawadi Tool, amazing. So why I want to actually drill down is because you said something very powerful. And it's one that I didn't yet capture, but the idea of boundaries, because you had mentioned that as part of releasing and having this reconciliation of moments, especially with your father that you've had to set boundaries. And can you just give an example of what that means? Because people talk about boundaries, but then to actually hold them for this experience? Could you talk about that?

Zawadi: You can only control what you are. It's in your sphere of control. I can't change other people, I can change myself, but I can't change other people. I just recognize, like, I wouldn't love books, if it weren't for my father, making us get up every Saturday and Sunday and read books and analyze them and, and have debates and I mean, we did all of that in our house, you know. So again, another upside. And so like, my critical thinking comes from my father, but he's a manipulator, we would build this relationship, and I'd call him and we have these discussions on politics. And at the end of the conversation, like well, daughter, you know, I need, you know, I need this, I need that and this whole thing. And then before I know it, it's like 1000s of dollars out of my pocket and my husband's like, whoa, wait, what? What's going on? And so I like, Okay, I gotta put boundaries. Like, that's not okay. I realized, like, the discussions came with an ask at the end. And so, you know, after so long with no, ask, and the ask not being given, then he didn't, wasn't interested in the conversations. And so I was like, Well, you know, if that is what the exchange is, then I guess then we don't have to have a conversation. So it just became like, what's healthy for me is reaching out. And if it's not reciprocated, then that's okay. I'm not going to be shelling out dollars for a conversation. So that's, you know, I just set a boundary around that.

Analiza: So clear, very powerful. And so let's take this powerful lesson because I, there's so much to learn from you Zawadi. And I want to get to your CEO journey. And I'm curious, did you talk with the women of color engineers and get advice? Did they also say you should try to be CEO? How did that come about this desire to be CEO?

Zawadi: Oh my gosh, no, that never, I would have been happy, you know, along my journey of going up the ranks as an engineer, because that's what I saw. I didn't see any, you know, CEOs. I didn't see any entrepreneurs really. And so that just came through just kind of being super inquisitive and asking questions once you get in certain rooms and that's another thing that I love about just this journey is I didn't learn not to say no. So when I'm invited somewhere, I say yes. And I asked questions. And I'm like, Well, what do you do? And how did you get to where you are? And just being curious and asking questions, and so that's always been my nature. And so I just started reading about people on their journeys. I love biographies. I'm always curious as to how people got to certain places, and I know that it's through connections and learning and where opportunity meets, you know, preparation, things, magical things happen. And so is it that's just pretty much my own kind of journey and seeking and asking questions and getting them circles, you know, like women, President organizations, or YPO, or a different organizations, I've been a part of where I've seen people moving up, and I'm always asking, How did you get there. And so this entrepreneurial journey actually started when a friend of mine asked me to help her put our business plan together for this Pediatric Urgent Care. My partner is a physician, a pediatrician, and, you know, she recognizes that she is a medical professional clinician, and she loves medicine, but she does not understand her like business. And so she was like, you know, can you help me put this business plan together and what started off as me just helping, eventually turned into me being a partner with her, and starting along this journey with her. And so we started with one little clinic as a proof of concept just to see if it was going to win over the doctors. And if the parents were going to trust us, and within a year, we were, like, just busting at the seams and needed to expand. And so we actually expanded that location and then added a second location. And before we knew it, we had eight locations. And so that journey really continued with me just asking questions, like, I didn't know what I was doing. So I didn't know the billing and medical jargon and all that. So I just asked around, like, who was the best at doing this? And I sat with this woman who asked her, “Can I just sit with you and understand this billing terminology, the foreign language to me? You know, I work in British Petroleum, oil and gas.” And she introduced me to the next person, because I was asking questions like, well, I can't answer those questions, but I know someone else that can answer those questions for you. And so the journey just continued, the pupil just passing me along for the next person that can answer my questions, enrolling in classes, you never stopped learning, right? You are just lifelong learners. And so I was like, you know, going to business school, they don't teach you like the details of running a business, you know, all of the ins and outs, and the tax and payroll, and all of that kind of stuff. And then once we got the business going, I'm seeing all these other people, I'm going to conferences, and I'm seeing people have more than one clinic. So I'm like, Okay, how do you go from one to two clinics? Like, how does that work? And so I like learning about scaling the business. Once we have multiple clinics, I'm like, Oh, I'm seeing people, like, have a whole network of clinics, you know, across the country, like multiple and multiple states, multiple cities. And I'm like, how does that work? So I'm like, again, just on the journey of questions to find out how people are growing and expanding their footprint in their business. So I think it's just having a natural desire to learn and to grow and being inquisitive. It definitely wasn't intentional, because I didn't have a model, or I didn't have examples of seeing myself in this role.

Analiza: I want to make sure I emphasize a few themes that sound like they started when you were young, maybe even from your mom, but versus that you see opportunity. And you'll see yes, that there's you don't know where it will lead. But if given an opportunity, say yes. Second is even if you don't know what to do, or who to talk to, just ask questions, be curious, and be humble. So that third, you can ask for help building a community. And there will be people who will show up, whether in conferences or in classes, or with your network. It's a drive to find out the answer, even if you don't know and also be afraid to make the ask or even if you're afraid just ask, ask and people will help or not help and it's fine. I do want to name that your deliberate way of networking. You mentioned conferences, but also you joined some pretty beefy networks, including YPO, as well as the Goldman Small Business Administration group. So taking advantage of opportunities, which you wouldn't have really known about had you not asked all these other people who've done it know you really, really powerful. So I want to ask you one more question that just talks about thriving as a mom, a working mom managing all the things you've had to sacrifice we all do. And I'm curious, are you glad you learned the practice now? What is something you wish you had known earlier?

Zawadi: A couple years. Years ago, I had a pretty significant health scare. And so in that period of time, I like scaled back everything, like I got off all the boards, you know, all the extracurriculars, it just gave me an opportunity to, like, keep the main thing, the main thing and to slowly add back things that I thought were impactful and significant. And I'm just like, Okay, I think God just kind of like, okay, you need to start to have a clean slate. And the only way I'm going to do that is like, by making you like, you're gonna have no choice. But to slim down, we've all done this exercise, right? That hole, put the big rock in the jar, you know, it's like, we've all done this. So it's not rocket science, it's not something that we don't understand. It's just we don't do it. Because at obligation or out of routine or out of whatever, you know, relevance, like we find our relevance through some of these organizations or clubs or whatever that we're in. And so for me, it just was like, Okay, now that I'm at the baseline, okay, first and foremost is me and my health. Absolutely. First and foremost, that's the foundation by which everything else might thrive. And then it was, you know, my relationship with God, you know, very spiritual person, very committed to my faith. And then family, you know, so those are, that's my core right there. And that's like, everything else is nice to have. So that's my core, right? That's my core base. And then from there, I build on, like, what things like now I'm like, I have more life behind me than ahead of me. So I'm like, Okay, what's impactful was significant, what's gonna build my legacy? And so for me, what's really, really important is to build a firm foundation for my children. And so my husband and I are like, Okay, what's the legacy that we're gonna leave behind for our children? And so we're really focused on that. So that's why I'm like, okay, like, are we gonna, you know, what are we doing as far as business wise, or building our wealth or building like, you know, what kind of foundation do we want to have as a family? What we are going to focus on, you know, is the education which is really big for us, is it you know, again, building something around our faith and education is really significant for us and mentorship. So that's really big for our entire family, we're all committed to that. And then all the other stuff can be added from there as I'm the board chair of our churches’ school in Kenya. And I like loving that, because that hits on many things like, you know, eventually we want to live abroad, we want our children to have that experience. And then I want to make sure I'm doing something related to world equity and education. As far as entrepreneurship is concerned, we're building, you know, an opportunity for them to have some skilled opportunities for them to make money. And so I'm like, Okay, how do I combine all the things I'm passionate about, and a few things that, you know, I can really dig in and go deep in making an impact and build that legacy? Keeping the main thing the main thing, as I said.

Analiza: It is so easy to say, Yeah, hard to practice keeping the main thing, the main thing, and I love that story. And particularly that, why do we need health care, right? Like, why does there have to be some big dramatic thing that happens and it makes us question all the things and I hope for myself and for others that we can learn and say let's do it now even without the scary thing. So this is beautiful. You are beautiful. Let us go all the way to lightning round questions. Ready?

Zawadi:

Analiza: Okay, chocolate or vanilla?

Zawadi: Vanilla.

Analiza: Cooking or takeout?

Zawadi: Oh, cooking.

Analiza: Climbing a mountain or jumping from a plane?

Zawadi: Climbing mountains.

Analiza: Have you ever worn socks with sandals?

Zawadi: Yes.

Analiza: How would you rate your karaoke skills on a scale of one to 10, 10 being Mariah Carey.

Zawadi: I would say seven and a half.

Analiza: You read a lot of biographies. And I'm curious if there was one of your favorites.

Zawadi: I am reading Viola Davis is like talking about a harsh childhood. I mean, that's and that's one thing about everyone's stories, like someone always has something that's going to be just I just like okay, well, there you have it is the survivor instinct is just amazing.

Analiza: What's your favorite way to practice self care?

Analiza: Wow, what's a really good professional development you've done?

Zawadi: One thing that I'm doing this summer, is I'm looking at Bill Gates' top 10 books that he recommends and I'm gonna be committed to reading at least half of the books that are on his list. I used to be really good at that, like my team. I would pick a book, and we would read it and we would have a project around it.

Analiza: What's your definition of a Boss Mama?

Zawadi: Oh, Boss Mama is someone that just really really embraces Both and doesn't don't think one is better than the other. And that also they infuse that in their children. You know, I love the fact that my daughter knows that I founded a company, you know, CEO, and she likes, looks at me and she's like, I can do that, you know, and my son, he looks at me, he's like, I can do that. I think that's really important too. Boss Mamas don't hide anything, don't sugarcoat it, don't make it sound, you know, like, it's all peaches and cream. And so I think that helps build resilience in your children, as well, just letting them see the ups and the downs, the good and the bad.

Analiza: What advice would you give it to your younger self?

Zawadi: I wish I had been bolder. Like, I wish I wouldn't have hesitated as much as I did.

Analiza: Where can we find you? Do you have a social media account or LinkedIn as best?

Zawadi: LinkedIn is the best?

Analiza: Do you have a final ask recommendation or any parting thoughts to share

Zawadi: Have you seen impostor syndrome? I would just say that you're unique, and you are fabulous. And there is no one else out there like you that is the truth. And so don't hide that, don't be afraid of it. Make known that that's your superpower. And not everyone's going to receive it? Well, it can be a lot for some environments. And so you know, just understanding what environments will appreciate your fabulousness and your superpowers and going in those directions. And so I think, you know, for me, that's a parting thought. And I'm still trying to figure it out. So if anyone has figured it out, let me know. Because I think it's a benefit to organizations to have this diversity and show up as we are not assimilated or sugar coated or vanilla could figure out how to harness all of this uniqueness, fabulousness intelligence into something that's going to benefit you as well as the organization and company you are associated with.

Analiza: Beautiful, so why do you thank you so much for your time and your stories? So appreciate you.

Zawadi: Thank you for having me.

Analiza: Thank you so much for carving out time today to hear today's podcast. Three things before you go. First, if you found it helpful, please leave a five star review. Second, please share with someone else you can share the link and posts on Facebook and say check it out. Lastly, I want to thank you for being a listener and you can go to get a free self care bonus called juice your joy at analizawolf.com/free Bonus. Thank you so much