Analiza: Hi, I'm Analiza Quiroz Wolf, proud Asian American, mama of two kiddos. I went from being a Burned Out Mama to being a Boss Mama, being a boss at work, home, and play. I'm on a mission to help more women be Boss Mamas. If you want to thrive at work without sacrificing family or self care, you are in the right place. For detailed show notes go to analizawolf.com/podcast and be sure to subscribe because I send out the best secrets I learn from my guests to my email subscribers. Now let's get into today's show.

Today I'm talking with Marissa Lifshen Steinberger. She went to Brown for her BA, then Columbia University for her Master of Education, and spent over 20 years in nonprofit education and foundation work. Most recently, she was at the Jack Kent Cooke Foundation, where she was a program manager helping low income students. You would think that Marissa was happy. She had a great purposeful career, she had these two beautiful kids, a husband, and a house. What she realized was that she wasn't happy. Marissa is going to share with us her Boss Mama journey. One of the things we talk about in Boss Mamas is operating from your zone of genius, getting really clear on what that is, and then living from there. Marissa is a great example of taking this on the court. She shares how she got really clear on what mattered to her. Then she took specific steps to align her mind, body and spirit with this Northstar. I'm really, really excited for you to meet Marissa,

Marissa, I'm excited to talk with you. Having been a person in education, making career shifts, even with this purposeful work, I'd love to hear about your journey. So let's start all the way back when you're young Marissa, and you are thinking about your life, your dreams, and not just career but bigger life stuff. What were you like, what were you thinking back then?

Marissa: I was really just a good kid. Like I just followed in the past my parents said. This is what you should do. So I remember lining up dolls in the kitchen, pretending that I was a teacher in a classroom, my dad was encouraging me to be a doctor, which was following in his footsteps. And then I got to AP Biology. I think we all realized that I was not going to be a doctor. But there was definitely something around making a difference. That was important. And I knew that I wanted to be a mom and to have a family. But I just didn't really know what the pathway would look like to get there.

Analiza: So maybe not a doctor, but perhaps a teacher and..

Marissa: Mom, those lines, right? Because those were my parents' professions. So that's what I knew. Analiza: Our parents model for us. What do they do? What's good? And we want to be good, right? We want that approval. So what did it mean for you to be good? Because you started that way. I was a good girl, I was a good student. What did that mean?

Marissa: So one of the funniest family inside jokes that my sister brother still remembers and will nudge me about is that in fifth grade, a substitute teacher, and me and two girlfriends decided to hide in the closet in the classroom. Because it was like a prank that we thought would be really funny. And all the other kids in class were laughing all through the class because we were sitting in the closet. And we actually would have gotten away with it. Except some time after that class, I went up to the substitute teacher and I asked for the homework assignment that I had missed. And the jig was up. So I remember not getting in trouble because my teachers and my parents were so relieved that I was like a normal person that actually pushed the envelope a little bit, because up until that point, I had really just been like, as much away from the fray as possible.

Analiza: Wow. Just picturing you and your girlfriends.

Marissa: And little Marissa.

Analiza: So just a rebel and then you’re, hi, teacher. I'd like to know what the homework is.

Marissa: I just never got into trouble. I never broke curfew. I never broke the rules. It just felt like that was wrong. That was bad. And I just knew that if I just follow the rules that that would kind of keep me safe and kind of protected. And a cushion. And so that's just what I did.

Analiza: I have a daughter, Marissa. I wonder if she could channel some of your goodness.

Marissa: I never questioned it

Analiza: You follow the path, you graduated from a great university, you go on to help, you know, with a very purposeful mission, helping kids of color kids who deserve better schools. Were you happy?

Marissa: Yeah, so much. I mean, I started really exploring that in my 20s. And when I was living in New York, because after graduate school, I just felt like there's something missing. Like, I thought I was hitting all the milestones and checking all the boxes along the way, but like, I'm not happy. So what's missing here, and because I was getting my Master's in Counseling, and it was very much encouraged for folks to be good in counseling themselves, and really started my journey to self exploration and differentiating myself, my parents, not just following that pathway that I had thought that they had laid out for me and on the rules, but really trying to consider what I wanted, and what was important to me and who I was from the inside. And that's an ongoing journey. I mean, I think that's like, what we all are doing right all the time, but really started to ask myself some harder questions. And that created some space for me to start figuring out what I wanted to do myself.

Analiza: So would you say, Marissa, that there was a turning point? Did you have kids already, like what was going on? Because I love that you are now practicing as a counselor in training, you're getting counseling yourself, were there any pivotal moments? Or was it just part of that natural journey?

Marissa: I have struggled with body image. And that's sort of always been there. But I have sort of put that into a bucket of like, that's my cross to bear. And so when I started thinking about having a family and my first son was born in October 2013, there was such a huge shift for me around my body, I had actually right before got pregnant, had become so focused on exercise, and health and nutrition, I had lost a lot of weight, I was at the best place of my life. In terms of my health and fitness, I actually became a personal trainer for a little bit, I don't know if you even knew, but I got my certification to be a personal trainer, because I was so motivated and focused on finally getting to a place where I felt comfortable with my body, and then I got pregnant, and then my body changed. And then nursing, it just felt like now that was something that I had lost control over too. So my transition to motherhood was really tough. And I talk to other women, I think it's something that we just don't talk about enough. But that definitely was sort of a jarring time.

Analiza: Wow. I mean, the whole concept of being good, right? It's not just being a good student and getting a good job. It's also like, You’ve got to look a certain way, right?

Marissa: And then I also just felt like this huge identity crisis. What is this motherhood thing, all of a sudden, one day, I'm not a mom. And the next day, I am a mom. And I didn't know how to do this. I had always done well in school because I understood how to navigate the system and follow what you needed to do to get an A or get a gold star. And all of a sudden, being a parent. That doesn't happen. There's no rulebook, there's lots of books, but nothing that actually is going to be accurate for what it is like, for real. And certainly every kid and every family is different. So I just felt like I had no guiding principles or Northstar at that point and decided about a year later after my son was about a year old. I felt like I needed to find something for myself. And I started picking up running and decided that I was going to start running one race every month for a year and culminate in a half marathon, which was like a huge experience for me. So that really gave me a focus. It was really great for me to channel my energy to have a project so to speak. For me that was just my outlet. I didn't want to take him in the stroller during those runs. Not an option. I really just used that as my time and it was really great. And I did a number of 5Ks and 10Ks and mud runs and obstacles. Then I finally did a half marathon in October of 2014. A few weeks later, I found myself at the psychiatrist's office looking for antidepressants and anti anxiety medication because I felt like, well, even after this, I'm not happy, this still doesn't feel like it. And I had put so much hope into this being the thing that was going to kind of pull me out and to help me figure out who I was. And even that wasn't the answer. So I didn't know what else to do.

Analiza: Wow. I mean, it's interesting that there is no rulebook, right, and even the rulebook that we might have, quote, unquote, learned from our parents or moms. And like, I'm not sure that that's the rule book I'd want to follow. Right. So you created one that said, Look, I have these races, I'm going to do this half marathon. I'm going to nail this and then I'll experience bliss.

Marissa: Think of the finish line? Oh, yeah, literally, yes.

Analiza: Thanks for being vulnerable. And sharing. It wasn't it

Marissa: It wasn't it. I think it was realizing that those were just distractions, maybe like just to check things off the list. But it wasn't really addressing the inside and trying to, again, integrate all those pieces of me like mind, body, and spirit, I just didn't know how to do that. And that was tough, I mean, I felt happy and proud of myself for seeking support. I had already been seeing a therapist, but I had never considered medication and counseling. I've talked with a lot of people, because I always felt like it was going to be a crutch. And I knew that wasn't going to solve any problems. But I think just knowing that I needed something more to take some of the edge off, because I was just in such a high anxiety place that I couldn't really focus on making great decisions and really being present when I had all this other kind of critical, negative talk going on in my head.

Analiza: I mean, hats off to you, Marissa for not just recognizing, but actually being willing to take steps to get help. Because as a mom, there's so much judgment, why you should be in motherhood bliss, why aren't you back to your normal size, running around the playground happy and pulled together. And yet there's a different reality. So I'm so glad you shared that. So you're getting help. And you know, now that you want to do the internal work? Were there any other moments that then got you really committed to this journey?

Marissa: Well, I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do next professionally and was really happy. At my organization, I felt like I was still growing, but I didn't really know what the next chapter would look like. And then, I guess, in 2014 to 2016, I was promoted in my organization and had a new responsibility overseeing all of our higher education scholarship programs. So I was like, Okay, this is going to be my new thing for a little while, and I wasn't going to look elsewhere, because I felt like this was an opportunity for growth. And then I got pregnant with my second son and didn't feel like it was a good time to look at other things. I think when I experienced that, I've talked to other moms, friends, when you're in those early childbearing years, and your kids. It's just hard to focus on anything else for yourself, right? It's a victory if you've taken a shower that day, or like, you know, to have two kids and to get out of the house in the morning is like an evening. So thinking about these other big picture dreams just was not happening around that time. And then I don’t want to say it's a rock bottom. The aha moment came for me in the fall of 2018, when my father passed away, and that was really, you know, sort of cliche, but a wake up call of like, time was limited. And you know, it's not worth spending this small, finite amount of time that we have been unhappy. So that was definitely a push to think about what I wanted to do next.

Analiza: Wow. I am sorry for your loss. And also just embracing you because those rock bottom moments don't necessarily have to be aha moments, right? They could send us in a spiral. Yet, you took that as a renewed charge to have the life that you want, which is amazing. So that happened. What did you do next then because you've got this big job.

Marissa: Yeah, well that's the thing, it's like I had the husband, I had the house, I had the job. I had the two kids and we get I'm still not feeling like I'm living my best life and still feeling like I'm in survival mode and just treading water every day. And that just didn't feel like the dream.

Analiza: So in many ways, Marissa, you had the life, you have this leadership role having an impact, you have these two beautiful boys, you've got the family, the husband. Don't you have it all? Aren't you happy?

Marissa: Yeah. Well, as a former Good girl or maybe still the girl I don't know, I felt like I had done all the things I had checked all the boxes, and some things still didn't feel right, it still felt like there was something missing. And then when my father passed away, it was sort of a kick in the pants to say, what are you waiting for, time is limited, our time here on this earth is limited. And to spend more time not feeling happy, I felt was really a waste of time. So I wanted to do something where I could really use that to motivate me and propel me forward and not just use it almost like he died in vain. And so I sort of decided within a few months that I was going to make a change. I didn't know what it was going to be yet. I still didn't have that clarity. But I knew I had just also turned 40, I think that was a big turning point for me. I just knew that something had to be different.

Analiza: I want to draw this attention to the idea of death, which is how I was really sad, and all the feelings that we have with people who love passing away. And you said I didn't want him to die in vain. I find actually death really motivating because it reminds me that we only have this moment we only have today. And how can we live our life without regrets? And with less should haves? More wants. What are the steps to getting today more clear on what makes you happy?

Marissa: Yeah, and I think just to pick up on what you were just sharing, like, there were two things that really became crystal clear for me. One was that he had worked so hard his whole life, to then have a retirement opportunity where he could travel with my mom, and they could see the world together. And they never had that chance. So sort of the idea of like, if there's something you want to do do it now because you just don't know what tomorrow will bring. And the other was that I just kept saying to myself during his eulogy, and you know, during the funeral service, like, no one talked about how good he looked in a bathing suit, like I had spent so much time. Right, like how much of my energy has been spent on my physical body, you know, consumed by that. And that is not what people remember. They remember your relationships, remember your impact, remember your connection, your generosity. So that really became clear to me that I wanted to make that shift. So I didn't know what I was going to do professionally. But I knew I needed to make a change. So I applied to a program at Georgetown for executive coaching, leadership, executive coaching certificate, super competitive, they had told me it was going to probably take a few cycles to be accepted. I was accepted the first time around. And I started that in September of 2019, a year after my father passed away. It was the first day of class where I was like, I think I've always been a coach. I didn't know that this was like a thing. But now obviously, looking back, I can say clarity, with clarity and the sort of connections between counseling, advising, mentoring, it's just sort of always been given all the way from high school, the kinds of things I was involved with, and leadership. And then even I remember in third grade, my nickname was mom, because I was so good at it, people would come to me for advice. When they were upset about something like I would be the one to help the friends. So it's sort of something that now I see as being so integral to who I am, but I really didn't know what that was going to look like. So I enjoyed the program. I really felt like it was immersive. It was self reflective and intensive. And then I decided, okay, I want to be a coach. But no way I'm going to open my own business like that would be crazy. I would maybe join up with an already established firm or subcontract to kind of do that. And then COVID hit, literally the week after my program ended in March 2020. And so everything stopped. I think I blacked out for two months. I don't remember anything with both kids at home working a full time job, like nothing is possible I just don't even remember that time of my life. And so then I said, I guess this is the universe saying that this isn't something that I'm supposed to do. Like I'm just going to put this on hold and yet again, put myself last when everyone else needs something. And then I just decided no, I'm going to do it differently this time and I started over that summer 2020. Taking on a few clients really low paying, it wasn't for the money, it was really just to get my hours for my coaching credential. And I was actually able to get enough hours by the end of 2020, to get my associate coaching credential. And I made the decision in October that I was going to do this full time and do it in alignment with my values, and being able to start something that was just focused on me and being in alignment with who I am. felt like such a poll, like I couldn't see it that any other way. And I gave my notice. And I launched officially on January 11. One Eleven Leadership.

Analiza: Amazing. Also 11 is your birthday.

Marissa: It's my birthday, November. And it's like a magic secret, like not a secret. But it's this magical number that I see all the time on license plates on clocks and receipts. My mom and brother and I even have an email, a text thread, with what 11 pictures and things that we see. And now when I make that connection, I think about me and it's something I feel like that's his way of showing up, like, I'm proud of you. I'm thinking about you, I'm looking out for you. So I think everyone has one eleven. And we just get so busy that we don't stop to pay attention to it. And if we could get more centered and quiet and remove some of the distraction of clutter that allows you to feel really connected and powerful.

Analiza: I'm just being with that reset that the one eleven is your dad connecting, loving you. And it's interesting as I listen because even though it was like life is giving you COVID of all these crazy things, these sort of steps. If I were to codify things, this called awakening, this realization happened with your dad, you then decided that was it. You were going to live your life now. And you then took action, and you didn't know where it was going to lead yet. But you took action and you leaned into how you're feeling. And you realize that you're meant for this, that your whole path being called mom was awesome. So things started to align and the universe started to align. And you leaned into trusting yourself trusting what was going to happen, even though you didn't know yet, right? And then even with that, there's this sense of energy. I think that when you lean into you and you trust you, it's this energy that you then give off and you attract. So you started attracting people, conferences, different clients, and it all sort of I know it sounds very, very cliche, like it all worked out. But it took these steps, right, these deliberate steps, trusting yourself taking action, deciding that then got to where you are. So I just love that so much. And this idea of Mind, Body Spirit, the mind piece, getting clear on what matters to you, the spirit piece, the body piece, I actually love for you to maybe talk about that, like the mind piece. And then those other pieces too.

Marissa: One thing I actually learned from Boss Mamas was the idea, the zone of genius versus the zone of excellence. And that was sort of a big lightbulb aha moment for me, because I think I've spent a lot of my life in a zone of excellence. And that was being a good student. And that was going to the certain schools, and that was having certain promotions and titles, and I was good at things and I could work hard and I could get the report card, right. But I think once you bring in that notion of the zone of genius, it shouldn't feel so hard. For me, coaching and facilitation with groups and teens has felt like I'm in flow. I'm just in that zone of genius because it's so aligned with my purpose, my values, like my gifts, my talents, my strengths, it just doesn't feel like work. And that for me has felt so liberating. So clarifying the feeling to be able to operate in that space.

Analiza: That's great. I love this idea, too, that like the zone of excellence can be tricky.

Marissa 24:08 Marissa:Yes.

Analiza: Because.

Marissa: Seductive.

Analiza: Yeah, because we're good at it. Right. We're known for it. And we get a lot of accolades for it. We are great at project management, and we get it done and we're efficient. But yet, when we like to check in with our buddies, you know, it's not this feeling of joy, right? We want to connect strengths with joy, which often it's not, we don't talk about joy. We don't talk about fun, but I hear you talking and I'm like geez. She sounds like she's having fun.

Marissa: Yeah, I think one piece that's been really helpful for me is thinking about my values and getting really, really clear on what my values are. And I have narrowed it down to empathy, authenticity, and really focus on equity and creating a business that allows me to do all of that and to show up pulling myself and embrace all the pieces of me. And that's led to some interesting reflections around how my mind and my spirit feel really connected right now in terms of living and working on my purpose and values. But my body is still feeling like this outlier that I haven't quite figured out how to integrate with the others. So one way that I've been connecting with that is through writing blogs. And I've written a couple of blogs now about my challenges with body shame, body image, weight, all those things. And I have been humbled and surprised by how many people have connected with those stories. One of my recent posts had over 1200 views, and it was picked up by Scary Mommy and just knowing that shame can only exist in the shadows, that being able to not hide the parts of me that feel uncomfortable or feel less than or flawed. And using that as a way to connect with people is a really big shift for me that I'm not quite there yet. To be honest, I'm still working through that. But it feels like wading in that pool a little bit. And that has felt really transformative.

Analiza: I love the stories that you share, they're so powerful. And they allow me to feel like I'm not alone in thinking about my body. What is the societal definition of a good body, per se? When I read your pieces, I always feel connected to you and your journey, and that I'm not alone. So thank you for sharing that.

So when I think about you, Marissa and your mind, body, spirit connection, all of that is the zone of genius. And I want to push because often, as long as I get the right career, as long as I have a career aligned with my values, and the things I'm good at, then I'll be happy. But we miss the rest of the pie or diagram.

Marissa: Yeah, metaphor for tequila. Little body image.

Analiza: Yeah, I know, right? Let's come up with something else. But I mean, what else can we include? When we think about the zone of genius, being joyful, being a mirror of being able to see ourselves accept ourselves and then move to loving ourselves. And I feel like the journey that you've been sharing has been that these moments, sometimes very, very hard moments, and how you've trusted, leaned into them, decided, gone on the journey, kept on trusting, kept on sharing, discovering yourself, accepting yourself loving yourself, and then sharing yourself. It's such a cool human body that it is scary, right? It's not like these things. Every step, you're like, Okay, here I am, I'm going to write a post about my mental issues like, jeez. That's really scary.

Marissa: It is really scary. And I think even though we're using body, right like that, and part of the goal, and I think, as you were talking the word that just kept coming to these alignments, I feel like, you know, that is now my new North Star. And one of the ways I've been practicing that is to embrace spaciousness. So as I set up my schedule, I've created space for writing, thinking, and planning. I don't see clients early on Monday morning, I don’t see them Friday afternoon, so I can have some transition in and out of my weeks. I spaced things out. So I don't have any back to back appointments, when I'm not feeling rushed, I can be fully present and fully engaged. And that is also giving me more satisfaction. So that then translates into how I interact with my family and creating space and having boundaries to have my husband take the kids to the baseball game with me, I don't have to go to every single one, right. And it's just creating space and knowing what I need in order to stay in alignment. So that has become a very powerful lens for me, and makes decisions actually a lot easier. Because if that is the North Star, so to speak, that's the guiding principle, then I don't have to ruminate on every single decision. It's just like, does this align with who I am and who I am in the world? Or does it not? And there's a lot of relief and liberation in that.

Analiza: So good. Often we get questions about clarity of life, like what's our big vision for life, and we are the designers, we are the designers of our zone of genius, knowing what those are our joy, and also creating those column schedules. But what is it? How do we actually make that happen? And deliberately then taking action to saying yes, to feel spacious to feel relaxed, I need space. Right? And we build that in which allows us to make decisions that align right and when we live in alignment, then we get what it is that we want, which is at the end of the day, right? Isn't it like joy and contentment? Peace? Yes, please. Whoever says that is all right.

Marissa: So one thing I have been talking a lot about with clients and recently did a workshop on was shifting to do lists to to feel lists. And I think that was something I also took from Boss Mamas is really that I had been really goal oriented, I would set goals for myself every month. Things I wanted to do differently, things I wanted to work on races, I wanted to run, right, or I want to learn how to cook delicious dishes. This obviously before kids, I wanted to try three different exercise classes that were different from what I was normally doing. And so it's all about the to do and then now I think about intention as the feeling of what is the emotion I want to elicit was the experience, I want to feel not just across the thing off the list. But to take that one step further. What is the experience I want to have? Because that is much more of a motivating factor, and drivers have authentic experiences rather than just focusing on all these things, which are really distractions, oftentimes, and filler filler stuff, not the good stuff.

Analiza: So good. What do we want to feel and make decisions from there? Because when we do that, we eliminate distraction. I love that it's your Boss Mama's thing. I'd never heard of that before. Right. And then we include it as part of our class and actually dive into it exploring. It's amazing how much it works, right? Where did you learn that? Probably not from our parents and our school? To be happy, how do you feel joy? Well, we do the things that make us feel joyous.

Marissa: Well, I think as women, we're fed a lot of stuff that we're supposed to feel fulfilled by motherhood writing, but having kids is why aren't you feeling fulfilled by this right. And I think that was so much of a setup for me. And I didn't feel that. And I felt like, of course, I love my kids. But I wasn't feeling like this sense of purpose from being a mother, that was one piece of my identity, but I didn't want to do the whole thing. So that's where I feel like trying to find this other piece professionally. And integrating it with being a mother and how all those things can be in alignment has really felt like a sweet spot.

Analiza: So good, the sweet spot where you can say it's not my kids and not be judged, right? That it is your kids. And yeah, these other things too, which includes yourself. So I love that so much.

Marissa: And I could be a better mom and I can be a better partner and I can be a better friend when I feel in alignment and I feel connected to my purpose and I feel integrated with my mind body spirit. So I am still getting to those other things, but it's going to start with me.

Analiza: Beautiful, I love love. Love it. So we're going to close with our lightning round questions.

Analiza: Here we go. Chocolate or vanilla? Marissa: Chocolate

Analiza: Cooking or takeout?

Marissa: That's not even close takeout. My husband does all the cooking in our house,

Analiza: Climb a mountain or jump from a plane?

Marissa: Jump from a plane. Just because climbing a mountain sounds exhausting.

Analiza: Have you ever worn socks with sandals?

Marissa: Um, probably. But I try not to do it very often.

Analiza: How would you rate your karaoke skills on a scale of one to 10/10 being Mariah Carey?

Marissa: Three in terms of singing vocal ability, but seven or eight in terms of performance.

Analiza: Nice, recent book you read?

Marissa: I'm in the middle of, I do audiobooks because I don't know who has time to read your books but when I do my walks, and listen to podcasts and audiobooks and right now I'm in the middle of Emily Nagoski's audiobook and it's really been great. It's all about things like anatomy and physiology and things that I feel like we should have learned in health class in middle school, but they certainly weren't teaching us. So it's been a really important interesting female empowerment book, I recommend it.

Analiza: What's your favorite way to practice self care?

Marissa: My favorite way to practice self care is spending time with girlfriends. And those relationships are really important to me. And I try to do it a lot. We live right by some trails. So going for walks or runs is an important part of my day now, especially since I'm working from home. But I would say books, some spending time with girlfriends and a massage every once in a while.

Analiza: So since you took the Boss Mama's class, what did you get out of it?

Marissa: I think it was very clarifying. Literally the same week that I launched my new business so it couldn't have come at a better time. I knew I wanted to have a community and find other like minded women who were juggling work and family and trying to do the best that they could in all these places, but feeling really exhausted and overwhelmed and stretched thin and prioritizing ourselves and doing that together. As we're striving for Mind, Body, Spirit connection was such a gift and has continued to yield dividends.

Analiza: What's your definition of a Boss Mama?

Marissa: I think it's all of us striving. To make an impact in the world and know that it has to come from the inside out feeling good about herself in order to create those ripple effects within her family, her community, really pushing the envelope, fierce confidence, but always striving to integrate so that she can feel whole.

Analiza: What advice would you give your younger self?

Marissa: More fun. I did not have enough fun. In high school in college, I was too worried about being a good girl not rocking the boat, because I felt like that was the way. So now that I see that's not the way I wish I had more fun. So I'm trying to make up for lost time now.

Analiza: How can we find you?

Marissa: So I am on Facebook, I have a one on one leadership group. It's a private group where I post every day and there's a free active engaged community. I also have a Facebook business page, you can find me there One Eleven leadership, and then on LinkedIn, one eleven leadership or a Marissa Lifshen Steinberger. My website is One Eleven Leadership dot com and all my information is on there as well.

Analiza: Nice. Any parting thoughts recommendations? Any questions for the audience?

Marissa: Hmm. I think the intention of finding a Northstar was a really big aha for me. So to spend some time may not come to you like as you sit down for five minutes, it might evolve. And to find a way to identify with those that know those things are for you would be really helpful. And then find mentors, find a community. We're not meant to do this alone. I think that was one of the other messages that I somehow inherited, that there's something wrong with you. If you can't figure this out. We're not meant to do it alone. So lean into mentors, lean into professionals, therapists, whatever coaches, to be able to support us so that you can live your best life.

Analiza: Awesome. Thank you so much for this conversation. I always enjoy you.

Marissa: Thank you. Bye.

Analiza: Thank you so much for carving out time today to hear today's podcast. Three things before you go. First, if you found it helpful, please leave a five star review. Second, please share it with someone else. You can share the link and posts on Facebook and say check it out. Lastly, I want to thank you for being a listener and you can go to get a free self care bonus called juice or joy at analizawolf.com/freebonus. Thank you so much.