Analiza: Analiza Hi, I'm Analiza Quiroz Wolf, proud Asian American, mama of two kiddos. I went from being a burned out mama to being a Boss Mama, being a boss at work home and play. I'm on a mission to help more women be Boss Mamas. If you want to thrive at work without sacrificing family or self care, you're in the right place. I'm launching my next cohort of women leaders starting in January. The online course is eight weeks and has helped achieving women get the balanced joy and fulfillment they deserve. Go to Analizawolf.com/bossmamas to learn more. Now let's get into today's show.

Cora, I'd love to learn more about your mom and your dad growing up in Mexico. What was it like there? And why was it so important for them to come to the US?

Cora: My mother had a third grade education. And it was challenging for them. She was proud of her upbringing. She had a loving mother and a loving father. But they were pretty poor. They lived under a tree for some time. They literally didn't have a house to sleep in. And so it was in between places. But she said there was a period of time where they had absolutely nothing. And they all slept under a tree until they could find someplace to shelter them.

Analiza: Your mom then met your dad. And they were both working really hard. So that land dispute that your family went through, there were real physical consequences to that too.

Cora: There were a few altercations with my father and him defending his land, his property right having children at home, and he actually worked as a truck driver and would be gone for days. And I remember my mother telling me a story where she said it was raining and they came by to intimidate her. And she says I'll never forget it because I had my children at home. She pulled out the shotgun. And she started like, No, not today. And she was so strong and so tough. She didn't wait for my father. She said I can, I've got my hands and I've got the Lord. And he's going to protect us. And she literally scared the hell out of them. And they left. I think it brought her through that experience. Although it was scary, it built courage in her. And I'm so glad she shared that story. Because to me that exemplifies the type of woman that she was.

Analiza: It's amazing. It's so inspirational. And I can see why your parents decided they would move to see your aunt in Southern California. So that's where you were born then Cora, the youngest of eight. Can you tell us what was it like?

Cora: My parents never learned English. We actually were with my aunt and her family for about a year. And my dad worked as a gardener, of course. And he raised enough money to purchase a home in this little town called Thermal California. My mom worked at a date packing warehouse at night, and she cleaned houses during the daytime. When I went to school, I was immediately tracked as ESL. So my entire life, probably my entire academic life. It was really a challenge for me, because I didn't understand these broad vocabulary words. And it really impacted me as a child because I always felt insecure and embarrassed about that, like, my parents don't speak and I was their interpreter wherever we went. And while my other older siblings, everyone worked, right, everyone kind of pitched in for the house payments, the food, the group, but I'll tell you that my mother never even drove; she never learned how to drive a car. And I started driving when I was like 13 out of necessity. Driving a minivan. I remember having a booster and because she used to have to pay bills. I am literally driving and there was a very small town, no street lights, but again, out of necessity. And I just thought it was normal to me. But yes, back to the ESL it was always a challenge. But I guess that's the value I added to the families. I was the translator and on occasion she opened the mail and had me translate for her. So for me, though, academically, I just recall it being such a weight. And it was super frustrating. And I always felt like I had to work twice as hard three times as hard.

Analiza: But being labeled with those negative stereotypes. How did you get through that?

Cora: I learned from my mother that you don't play the victim, you deal with the circumstances that are given to you. And it just means you work harder. And no one worked harder than my parents and I thought, okay, how do I get past this? They just inspired me and motivated me to work harder. It lit a fire in me that said I may be like this today but I'm not going to be like that tomorrow. I'm going to use it to motivate me to do better and be better with my language.

Analiza: And even with that Cora, you were not treated well. In terms of other people, and that story of being on the Prom Court, could you share that with us?

Cora: Sure, I'm super grateful. There are events that I can very vividly remember in my mind, which again, were very hurtful when it happened. But then it kind of catapulted me to a different mindset and way of thinking. So I'll never forget being at the grocery store. And my parents were super loving, and very kind to everyone and totally appreciated being here in America. And I remember them being called a name. And my parents and my mom just smiled. And I thought, okay, that person is ignorant and doesn't know what they're talking about. And my mom has so much to give. And she's such a wonderful person, I didn't let her know what happened. I just kind of turned something inside me and said, We're not going to stay like this. And that's not okay. But I'm going to learn from it and use it to motivate me to be better. And then on the Prom Court, and I will tell you, in high school, I was about 40 pounds heavier, I wore glasses, I had buck teeth, and my skin was angry. I don't know how I ended up on the Prom Court. But I did thank God. And I'm super grateful for that. But I remember winning that night. And I made friends with everyone. And I consider myself the class clown that I am, but it's okay. When I won, I remember hearing someone else in the prom in the Prom Court and the other princesses or whatever you call them said, this is the only thing she'll accomplish. That was so painful. And I do recall that moment. At times, though, I thought, I didn't know if I was going to go to college. I didn't know what I was going to do after my senior year. But now I'm super grateful for it because I decided right there. And then this doesn't end here. And again, I don't hate her. I don't I'm actually grateful. That's what I needed to hear to get me to push myself toward that new chapter in my life, a new journey, then so be it. So I took my SATs and I enrolled in college.

Analiza: It's incredibly inspirational. And I'm thinking about you and your parents smiling as they get this really disrespectful statement and how you stepped up then and are you stepping up with this Prom Court when but some mean remarks again, and how you decided that you're going to go to college. So talk to us about that. So you went on to California State University Northridge. How did that experience go?

Cora: It was very daunting for me. I was super scared. And again, being the youngest of eight and the first to go to college away from college. My mom was mortified because she thought it might get you just to your work. And the fact that I graduated high school was an accomplishment, right? You know, I'm super spiritual. And I feel like it was just kind of God orchestrating my entire life into little experiences that got me to where I am today. And so yeah, I signed myself up. I attended California State University Northridge. My parents helped me and my family helped me with the first few years of college and I remember I'd had to, like work full time to put myself through school. I started off as a political science major, and I took some of those courses. I took a business class, and I remember it was finance, or economics and it was super challenging. And I'll never forget this gentleman, Harris Bryson who went to the same church I went to. I asked him to help me with tutoring. He was a finance major. And I'll never forget it, but this is one of those other life changing events, right? He was getting frustrated with me understanding the curriculum and he got really I guess, not annoyed, maybe impatient and he said, You know what, Cora? I think instead of Political Science, why don't you do something a little bit less challenging, like Liberal Studies or child development? Like that might be better for you? And I feel so stupid and that's not his intent, right? But he was just trying to give me advice. I decided then that okay, no, I'm going to not only forget political science. I'm going to major in business. And I'm going to pick the hardest business major just to prove you wrong at the time it was just to prove them wrong. But again, it was to kind of prove it to myself that I could do it. And so I remember telling him hey, I changed my major to MRIs which is computer science and business. I worked my tail off. Analiza, I just remember it's just so much work studying on the weekend. I never went out because I was always studying because everything was always so much harder for me. But I so appreciate those words from him because that is what again catapulted me into making a life changing decision.

Analiza: Gratitude for the hard things, hard thing after hard thing and the hard things keep coming. So Cora, tell us about your climb up the corporate ladder.

Cora: My roommate, Paula Jamison. She's still one of my great Best Friends today, we were roommates and she said, Hey, she used to work at Long's drugstore. She's putting herself through college as well. And she said, Hey, Cora, I signed you up for an internship just show up on Wednesday for this interview. And that's where you'll interview. I thought you'd be a great candidate. So make sure you go and I thought, like, what? Being a college student, I didn't have a whole lot of money. And I never forget, I thought I wanted to look presentable and businesslike. And I remember wearing a gray pleated charcoal skirt with this loose sweater, these freaking pantyhose that I had where the crotch is too short. And I am like, oh, every time I walk the crotch, Cora not a problem. I mean, I remember sitting at the interview, and I'm trying to cross my legs because the crotch was a mess. And I'm like, Lord, You are in control. Forget the pantyhose. But I just remember thinking maybe that was just a distraction. So it takes some of the nervousness away. And I just remember sitting there worried more about mechanics than the interview, and the interview went fantastic. She loved me. And I thought, Oh, cool. And it really again, started off my entire career in corporate.

Analiza: So tell me you're in this very male dominated career now. How did you handle it? I'm imagining that there's some prejudice that you face there.

Cora: You're a female and you're Hispanic. You got it made. I very intentionally thought about my name Castro. My married name is Schumann. And I thought that no, I'm not going to use that as a ticket anywhere. And so I kind of kept that hidden. And you know, my looks are very generic, could be anything. And I just remember thinking, No, I will never use or play that card ever. Just because I was offended when someone even brought it up. Like, why would you even think that I would need that. And so again, I'm just kind of glad that they did that, because it just kind of forced me in a different direction. I thought, Nope, not gonna do that. And so anyway, it's called unconscious bias for a reason. And I have absolutely seen it. I’ve see it in different ways. And I will tell you, Analiza, that sometimes I'll get a call from a co-worker, or someone that says, you intimidate the hell out of that guy. And I thought, what? Like, I'm like, Why is he being such a jerk to me? Like, why literally, someone said, I'm going to work with your team, but you are not part of this team. And I thought, What did I do? Did I offend? My first instinct was super insecure, thinks I'm an idiot, and I'm stupid, and I don't belong. And I remember again, God sent someone in the team to call me and said, Nope, it shows that this guy is intimidated by who you are. And that's why he doesn't want to deal with you. And I thought, I mean, I was so happy one because I wasn't an idiot, but that other people thought that and it didn't come from me. And I just think he is from God, you know, to say you're special, and you are important, no matter what anyone says.

Analiza: Cora, not only do you stand there, but you actually took action to say something can you share about that?

Cora: Oh, sure. And I again, as women, I, as I get older, I'm 48 now, and I think, Gosh, how can I help others as women are working on? I think we need to support each other a lot more, and look for opportunities, whether they know it or not, to help each other. And I thought I didn't want to say anything, because I don't want to be that girl, like, oh, god, okay, someone's complaining is the girl in here. And I thought, No, I don't want him to treat other women like that. I don't want him fired. I don't want him fired. And that's what I told management and HR said, Listen, I don't want him fired. I just want him trained. I want him to be aware of what he's doing, maybe doesn't know it, I'm going to give him the benefit of doubt. And he's super intelligent. He's a very smart person. He can't treat women this way. And I know I'm not alone, because there's other women that he works with. And I thought if I was being super honest and genuine, God would allow HR to see that I was being honest and genuine and not trying to work from any angle. But again, the premise was, let's help him as well. I don't want to attack anyone that's helped him. But I think the opportunity, and the benefits of it outweighed any lash back and fear inside me.

Analiza: I love that because you're taking the view that there's something bigger than yourself, and that includes God. And God is a theme in your story, through your life and your family life. And it's really powerful that every time you've had the hard thing, you've seen that hard thing as a gift. And you've turned to God as a way of saying there's something in this for me to learn something in this for me to stand up and be stronger. It's really inspiring, Cora. So Cora, I know that you met someone who was older than you. And I'm curious because that's how you ended up being a mom to three kiddos.

Cora: When I was in school, we always talked about Ooh, who would want to marry and you know, and I never really dated in college because I was too busy in those dang study groups, but it's okay. And I remember just trying to figure out what I wanted in my church leader, the youth leader, Debbie Wilson. I love and I'm very close with. Why don't you write down a list of things you want in a husband and start praying about him now, which really struck me because I remember praying with my mom. She used to have us pray with her and kneel in her bed. And she used to pray about my husband and my kids, and I think, but that's how she's already prayed about for the next generation. So that struck me. And I thought, yeah, well, why wouldn't I pray about it? My mom's been praying about this, too. So I remember writing a list of everything I wanted in a soulmate in a person. And of course, it's someone who fears God. But I mean, it was an endless list and always alone. And I was asking for everything. I mean, everything. And I remember I shared the list with my husband for his birthday party, and he is 14 years older than I am. We met through a mutual friend. And when I met him, my heart just kind of raced. I thought, oh, Lord, and I prayed about that, too, and that he was actually seeing someone else at the time. And I thought, No, we're not going to get sucked into that drama. But I said, I'm just going to pray, see what happens. And yeah, I'd say about maybe a year later, we connected and I shared anyway, in a birthday party for him. I shared it with everyone but the list I had made and I kind of joked because I said everything that I asked for on that list was nothing compared to what God blessed me with. Except I didn't put bald here and he's like, my golden sword in my 30s. And I just thought, Okay, it's hysterical. But I was amazed at God's goodness and His answer to prayers, right. I mean, I'm so grateful. That list is tucked away somewhere somehow, but I just thought absolutely, absolutely answers prayers. So I'm super grateful for that. So we got married a year later. And since he's 14 years older, we started having babies right away. So I call it you know, Greg with our honeymoon baby and honeymoon, baby. My mom was super scared. She was doing the math, and maybe a month after we got married is when I got pregnant with Greg. And then 16 months later, after Greg, that we had Tom and then 16 months later, after Tom we had Maddie. So I have a 15, 16 and 17 year old now and they are just amazing, super grateful. They love God too. And I you know, but Yeah, seriously, everything I pray for is God blessed me with so I'm so much to be thankful for.

Analiza: Cora, this theme of gratitude, gratitude for all the wonderful things, the hard things. It permeates your life. Can you walk me through a quick day in the life like what does that look like for you, when you wake up? When do you go through your day when you're going to meetings? At the end of the day? How do you embed that?

Cora: The most powerful gift my mom has ever given to any of your children, obviously, they didn't have monetary riches or anything. But she always taught us to pray and people say when did you start praying I said I've never not known to pray. As a child as a baby. I said, I just remember being very little. I was always taught to pray. So it's a journey. And the more you pray, the closer you draw to God. And there's nothing more important in this world for me than my relationship with God. And that's what I tell my kids. That means he's the one I talked to in the morning, and the one I talked to at night, first thing and then last night. So I wake up in the morning, and I say thank you, even if I'm going through hard times or anyone you know, I think firstly, thank you that I'm awake. And thank you for the opportunities that are going to be presented in front of me today. Even though their challenges the challenges are always an opportunity as well. I pray for my kids, I pray for my family, my friends, there's so much to be thankful for already the fact again, health so much and so I feel that drives me in the morning for the rest of the day. It just kind of sets the tone, no matter if I get my butt kicked at work or whatever it's like I still have a lot to be grateful for. And that is the foundation of my day every single day.

Analiza: Alright, Cora with that. Let's lighten it up a little bit with fun lightning round questions. Your red hot dress for the people who can't see you. You look beautiful. Watch the video. Alright, let's start with our first question: chocolate or vanilla.

Cora: Vanilla.

Analiza: Cooking or takeout?

Cora: Cooking.

Analiza: Climb a mountain or jump from a plane?

Cora: Climb a mountain. I don’t do heights. Hmm.

Analiza: Have you ever worn socks with sandals?

Cora: No.

Analiza: So how would you rate your karaoke skills on a scale of one to 10-10 being Mariah Carey?

Cora: Everyone else would say zero. I say Ten.

Analiza: What's a recent book you read?

Cora: I read it every day. A Bible.

Analiza: What is your favorite way to practice self care?

Cora: Oh, just kind of like online shopping or browsing through stuff. I don't do this alone. I don't do nails. I don't do anything like that. But I just love HGTV. Honestly, I know it's not self care, but I just love those freakin shows. And I love everything about it in that little escape to me is self care.

Analiza: What's a good professional development that you've done?

Cora: I was part of a women's it's called Symantec Women and Networking, an organization where I would interview other corporate women to share their experiences with other women. So that especially you know, whether you're just starting out or have already been there, or single or have kids, I think it's important for executive management, especially women, to encourage and inspire other women by their stories. And they become more relatable, I think, as well. So it's women helping other women. So I'm pretty proud of that women's organization and women during my previous employer.

Analiza: What's your definition of a Boss Mama?

Cora: There is so much power in the words, I've been there. And if you've been there, and are on the other side, or even going through it, I think sharing your experience with others who are either in it, or are going to go through it, just that awareness and that. So it's sharing your experiences with other women, knowing that it would help them.

Analiza: What advice would you give your younger self?

Cora: You're right where God wants you to be. And just keep trusting him and it's going to be just fine.

Analiza: And then where can we find you like LinkedIn or anywhere like that?

Cora: Oh. So I kind of gave up on social media just with three kids and a full time overtime job. But I do have Instagram and Facebook.

Analiza: And then the last question is, do you have a final ask recommendation or any parting thoughts to share with the audience?

Cora: I have this on my Facebook profile. It says the world is changed by your example, and not your opinion. And I think that those are powerful words. And just know that every day, there's always an opportunity to make a difference. And not just for women, for anyone around you. Just recognize those opportunities, whether they're big or small, getting the door for someone bringing a copy for someone, especially women who are so compassionate, and I think have a lot of empathy. Don't ignore those opportunities. Use them every single day and reflect on them at the end of the day. Because I promise you, you've made more of an impact than you think.

Analiza: Beautiful. Thank you so much. Cora, love this discussion with you.

Cora: Thanks, Analiza. Have a great day, everyone.

Analiza: Thank you so much for carving out time today to hear today's podcast. Three things before you go. First, if you found it helpful, please leave a five star review. Second, please share with someone else you can share the link and posts on Facebook and say check it out. Lastly, I want to thank you for being a listener and you can go to get a free self care bonus called juice your joy at analizawolf.com/freebonus. Thank you so much.